Robert subby biography

Robert Subby, a well-known addiction professional explained codependency as a response to practicing living with dysfunctional rules.  Children who grow up around addiction learn dysfunctional rules in order to survive; it can be quite challenging to unlearn those rules as an adult.  One of the “rules” that many of my clients learned is “Don’t be selfish”.  This means ignore your own needs or place other’s needs ahead of your own.

Growing up around alcoholic or mentally ill parents, children learn to put their own needs aside and focus on caring for their parents.  Eventually this leads to feelings of anger and resentment.

Codependency: Recognizing the Signs and Symptoms

Subby describes it well in his book Lost in the Shuffle: The Codependent Reality- “If we believe that our own needs are wrong, we will never be able to get those needs met. What often happens in codependency is that we try to feel good about ourselves by taking care of others and eventually our self-esteem becomes dependent on caretaking.&nbs Lost In The Shuffle: The Co-Dependent Reality: Subby, Robert ...

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